Becoming a Happy Playful Wife Isn't the Pursuit, It's the Byproduct
Disclaimer: If you are a part of the 1 in 4 women who've experienced domestic violence by a spouse, this is not for you. Click here for the domestic violence hotline, and know that I'm praying you find the resources and help you need. This is also not for the women who would call me out in a snarky email or comment for not having this disclaimer front and center. You'll find better support with someone else who will tolerate less etiquette and courtesy. This is for the 3 in 4 women in non-abusive marriages who are at a loss with how to improve their marriage or want to increase intimacy and attraction.
If you didn’t feel unheard or misunderstood, how would you show up in your marriage and life?
What kind of mental bandwidth or creativity might you be able to tap into if you didn't have to dig yourself out of frequent emotional holes and ongoing fights?
How would your days feel if they were filled with playful conversations and intimate exchanges rather than lingering feelings that something is missing or downright...wrong?
When you’re upset, wouldn’t you love to learn how to express your emotions without blowing up or stuffing them down until they fester into resentment?
When you've been in a marriage long enough, you begin to discover things about your husband that you didn’t know were there. You find out he is human, has weaknesses, or can only bear so much.
And even when it's not an abusive or toxic marriage, you will find reasons to hate him or leave him or forget what it was you even liked about him in the first place.
And then, you have a choice: do I remove myself from this altogether; do I settle for a lifeless marriage; or do I press on and offer the same grace I hope he offers me?
Because guess what? The same flaws and annoyances you’ve discovered about him, he’s discovered about you.
And that can leave you feeling:
...insecure
...ashamed
...unbothered (because you're just giving him what he deserves, right?)
...or confused about how to stay connected when you're both flawed and figuring it out.
If you’re exhausted from trying to fix things, only to make them worse...
If you want more out of your marriage...
If you don’t want to nag your husband about pitching in, spending time with you or being more affectionate...
This space is for you, and I have self-study workshops and coaching programs tailored to your struggles and needs as a wife.
While we love and honor our men around here, this is specifically a "No boys allowed!" clubhouse, even if you resent the fact that your husband should be learning, too (he should be, but not here!).
If you want to connect to your husband's heart and feel seen, heard, and understood, check out my Communication Revolution Workshop and watch for more to come.
Hi, I’m Holly.
Writer at heart.
Marriage Coach by design (and certification).
Entrepreneur by “accident.”
Wife and homeschool mama by intention.
Lover of Jesus by grace.
Student of the Holy Spirit by choice.
The first thing you should know about me is that I’m not a counselor or therapist. I’m also not proclaiming to be an expert on your marriage either. Although I do have a master’s degree, I didn’t get one in psychology.
I am, however, a Certified Marriage Breakthrough Coach™ who was trained and certified by a Christian marriage coach with more than 30 years in the industry. I've also been married to my husband for more than 10 years (I even wrote a book about how I met him while at an orphanage in South Africa).
I help you learn how to express yourself in a way your husband understands, reframe your thoughts to overcome triggers and resentment, and increase intimacy so you can rediscover the happy, playful woman that feels like she can flirt, play, and laugh at the days ahead.